How is that I've been away from Bulldog since February 17th? Well, there are a lot of reasons and then some hemming and hawing. I've been feeling my frustration with myself build over the last week. Once or twice I was even awake at Bulldog time, but chose not to go. I'm very disappointed with myself, but in a gentle way -- I understand what I'm going through -- but I also know that it's time to get back to what I know makes me feel better.

Knowing this hasn't stopped my brain from churning through excuse after excuse. Monday is such a busy day! You'll get a migraine! You're going to be wiped out all day! You might even hurt yourself! Wait, wait -- you'll fail, you don't belong, you're just going to quit again and everyone knows it!! You don't even have a pre-workout banana.

Oof! Where does all this stuff come from? I know that I need to let these thoughts pass overhead without engaging them. I need to keep to my plan.

I've been very inspired by this website today.

So I'm off to pick up some bananas and take care of my class plans for tomorrow tonight so I won't have to worry about that. I will probably get a migraine whether I workout or not -- at least it will have come from doing something good -- and same thing goes for being wiped out, etc. And I can only fail by not going. Yep, time to just fucking do it.